Sunday, November 20, 2005

Back to Pavillion

Right now I am writing a project report on 'Sealed Sources - leak tests and its evaluation' . After that I have to prepare a power point presentation of the same report. I have already completed the other reports for this Medical Health Physics Course.

After that, I'll pack my clothes and other things and go to Hyderabad. No doubt will have a bash there. And will enjoy making home videos and taking photos. WIll come back on Jan 4, but that is too far a day to think about.

Bye bye!!

Wednesday, October 19, 2005

Rahman's music

Music is a great healer I guess. Atleast, it works for me. Nowadays, most of them hear to some or other kind of music to keep themselves relaxed. I keep myself occupied by closing my eyes and listen to the rejuvenating music of A.R. Rahman.

There are always some sounds that pull your heartstrings and remain close to you. These sounds are usually well tuned in a song by Rahman, which makes one to listen to them repeatedly. You see a lot of hardwork put in each song. No carelessness, no lack of dedication. But simply splendid delivery of tunes. Also, one thing that should be noted is that, even the singers sing pretty well and give their best in Rahman's songs.

One needs to draw inspiration from him and learn the art of concentration and dedication to one's work. He's a remarkable genius!

Saturday, October 01, 2005

Quik Trak Kiosk!!

Me so happy. Me a little tired past couple of weeks. Me having a lot of work and a lot to prepare. Me always crib about things as usual. So me back to square one.

Had good time at Baltimore. Everything is splendid and pompous. I had little time to spend but the time spent was worth for the day. But it was a lonely affair. Going to Stony Brook LIRR alone to New york. In the train alone, in the hotel alone, walking around alone, presenting the poster alone and coming back alone. I think that day I spoke only few words, that too to myself. But thats ok, once in a while one should love oneself to be alone and experience how it would be.

So BMES Conference is over. Now more on the other presentations for the BME 540 course and then work in the lab. It was a failure in the past 2 experiments. So a lot to do.

On other note, I can blabber on something I like as always. Rahman is a genius!! Nobody will understand that. Well he creates magic and personally heals me from all the stress I may have. So me back to listening music now.......................................

Monday, August 29, 2005

Mu sick!

I have been reading a lot about lifting of tunes from Pakistan music in Bollywood. Definitely its a shame. The first thing that comes to the mind of any average music lover about the copy cat of music in Bollywood would be none other than Anu Malik (Annu Mallik, Anu Maalik....whatever, he's been trying to change his name and luck recently).

How many people remember him for getting a national award for the movie, Refugee?? In fact, it became a joke! Doing original stuff is next to impossible for him. But he actually inspires me a lot. Simply because, even I can also do what he does. I cannot be a Kamal Hassan or a Mani ratnam or Saching Tendulkar or A.R. Rahman (definitely not!).........but I can be a Anu Malik. Its very easy to become 'him'.

About other sane things, I think Wikipedia is a good source of finding things that one is looking for. I was just surfing few sites and when it comes to music, it will be Rahman first and other things later. Well, I have liked what our President has commented on ARR's music:

"A.R. RAHMAN may be a Muslim but his voice echoes in the soul of all Indians, of whatever faith, when he sings Vande Mataram."

This was in the Rahmania site. Such a great man he is....lots of inspiration for me atleast. Now a recent addition in the same mentioned site is that the background music of ARR's Swades is composed as a song in the new movie, Salaam Namaste.

Forget about these petty things. If one asks, did Rahman lifted a tune in the past?? Well, few say yes because, they hear the same sound or beat in some of his movies. But.......just wait there...and ponder..........

One is just hearing the beats being lifted, not the tune. See, again its the limited use of the loops and samples that he uses and not the tunes that he creates by himself. When a person reaches to his professional high, there will be many people to pull him down. The work of these people is just that, 'to pull somebody down'. Because, that the best they could do.

Nowadays, its more like a tom & jerry or a kids fight. Little courtesy and hardwork is enough to mind one's business. One need not be intelligent I guess.

[90 minutes, just passed........]

Actually, I was reading the biography of Rahman and got lost. Now I feel really lucky to meet A.R. Rahman at JFK Airport last year. He is a great man........indeed!

Sunday, August 28, 2005

Hamaare Beach Mein....

My friend came to my place for the weekend. We planned to go to NYC and spend some time there. But he's coming from the city. We dropped that idea as we both have been there recently and no point loitering around there again.

We stayed back and watched movies. We saw Flavors. Then Kandukondain Kandukondain. Both were decent movies to watch and there was nothing much to do but to relax. We both spoke about our school days, college and after that.

In the evening, we went to West Meadow Beach .............nice beach. It was for the first time I've been to the beach at Stony Brook. For me, it didn't exactly seem to be a beach. There were many stones and rocks over there and no waves or tides. We spent some time there and been to Curry Club....came back.......then chatted for a while and went to sleep late in the night.

It wasn't fun, but it was relaxing and felt at home. Because we are meeting after 2 years and we had lot of them to talk about, other than e-mailing and talking on phone.

The rest of the day, I was watching Rahman's live in concert on my PC and then few songs after that........Rahman songs have that divine effect which I cannot (as always) express in words.

Sunday, August 21, 2005


Day: Thursday
Date: August 18, 2005
Time: 7:20 A.M. (IST)
Place: My house

Event: Bruno expired

My bro called me in the night (EST time) and told me about this. I called amma and she started crying on phone. I think she cried so much that day as if a family member has expired. It was a family thing for us. Nanna was devastated to see his dog lying in front of the house, unmoved.

Exactly a month back, the doctor predicted that Bruno will be alive until 6 months and slowly its liver and spleen would stop funtioning. It would be hard to breathe and the stomach would swell. I think the doctor was correct. Everything has happened as he said, except for the time span. Nobody saw it coming, as the night before he expired he was very active and did his duties just as on any other day. Surprising thing is that everything happened all of a sudden which is not digestable fact for me.

I thought of it all the time. The way he used to play, act and talk to was a gem of a dog. I always used to think that I can't see my dog dying in front of my eyes and I can't bear the fact its no more. Actually, I hoped to see him when I go in november this year. Atleast I could spend some time with him in his last days. But unfortunately, that didn't happen. The only memory of him is when I fed him last, before I left to US. It knew something was going on and also that I'm leaving. He was sniffing my suitcases and bag. It was more expressive with his eyes than a human being.

I think more than anybody else, it is tough for my nanna as he's the one who took care of both the dogs after I left home. He took Bruno and done with cremating him near the overbridge it seems. Definitely, my house will be of no life for a while without Bruno. He used to walk in all the rooms and always monitored us and almost made a mental note of where we are and what we were doing at each time.

He is the first being to greet me as I enter my house gate, after I came back from college. It was evening and time to take him for a walk. He used to see through that small gap between the gate and wag its tail as I came close to him. He always loved the way we used to touch him. He used to like it a lot and showed lots of emotions and love towards us. When my aunt was patting my back, he thought I was getting beatings from somebody and he used to pound on the other person. Such was his love for me. I virtually used to talk to him and he understands it very well.

I miss him. I miss all of it. When he came to our house, he used to follow me whereever I go and gave me company. I didn't have inclination for this dog in the begining. Once he kept his neck on top of my crossed-legs, while I was having my lunch, on the table. It was then that I realized that this is my dog and from here on he's my responsibility. I took good care of him..........I think.

I miss all of him now. I am helpless sitting 10,000 miles away from my home and thinking about him. I feel guilty of not being near him in his last days. I miss his presence, his expressive eyes, his walk, his roaring and his happiness with me.

My greatest weakness.........losing your loved ones.........thats what it is.

Wednesday, August 17, 2005

Days and events

"Get on a bus from New York to Boston and I'll pick you up from there. Can you come on Friday?", that was my bro on phone. He was desparate for a brake. I said ok and we both drove to Maine, after I reached Boston.

Maine is a great place to visit. Its scenic and beautiful. We've been to Fort Williams park, Cape Elizabeth and the headlights over there. We came back and been to bowling and pool. It was a first time for me getting involved in the recreational events.

August 12th marks a very important day for me, for the following reasons:

  1. This day last year, I came to US.
  2. I met A.R. Rahman at JFK airport.
  3. It happened to be more of a travelling day.

August 14th also holds significance as its my father's birthday and two years back I wrote my GRE on the same day. My friend calls me a psycho for remembering the past days with dates.

And august 15th is our independence day. But this time around the campus, I think it wasn't as much fun as it was last year. I didn't attend it and was feeling sleepy then. But interesting thing is that the Empire state building in NY was lit up with indian tricolor and there's going to be a parade from Aug. 21, celebrating this event.

Monday, July 25, 2005


Yea........some parts are missing. This picture was taken by one of my apartment mates, somewhere near Stony Brook.

I don't know who sculpted it or destroyed it but the remains give a very artistic look.

Who is an artist here????

Saturday, July 23, 2005

As you "like" it!!

It was evening at BNL and I got into the BNL shuttle and closed my eyes. Usually, if there is no disturbance, I would sleep and begin some random thoughts or a dream or some music comes up (its a really different tune you know??). But if somebody is talking among themselves, I listen to them with my eyes closed. Of course if its interesting.

But yesterday evening, two undergrad girls were talking about something which I didn't understand at all. But they were blabbering something, which made no sense to me. However, there was something strange in those girl's way of talking. They use a lot of "like" in their speech.

If was like........
we were like.........
Like.........I was like...........

Wow! can't they speak simple english??? And I was counting how many times one of the girls used the word 'like'. There were 104 likes in her gossip in a half hour journey! Forget about you guys, but I myself don't believe that I've counted so many of them. Maybe, american way of talking......but I know few amrus, who very well speak decent english and know what they are talking. I'm not talking about old, sophisticated people but very much young people who are good friends.

But talking about amrus english, one thing that I've observed is that there is so much emphasis of an expressive way of talking, rather than the meaning itself. It creates an impact on what one would like to say. My apartment mate always had issues with this way of talking.......the accent. bothered him a lot as he had to take ESL class in the first sem. We always make fun of this line in a movie, where the girl says,

"Who aaaaaaaaarre yyyyouuu?"

My friend says, "Kitnaa Kheenchthi hai be!" Other example was...

"Freeeeeeeezze, don't move".

"Am I a refridgirator??? Is there a compressor in my stomach or what??", was my friend's reply. Yes, sometimes its funny if english is not your native language. Because whatever you talk or listen, sometimes people tend to translate in their vernacular language and understand them. Another example is ........You Know...

There will be 100 You know's and Like's in people's conversation that tend to completely erase the essence of what they talk of. It irritates me for most of the time. Anyway, who cares, my own english is sometimes vague.

I am listening to main theme of 'Chariots of Fire'. Its soothing. I saw Pather Panchali. Its a decent movie with good print. Its about a rural family and how they go about their life. Good screenplay and surprised to see in the titles about the music....composed by Ravi Shankar. Also I didn't know that it was Satyajit Ray's debut film that won him accolades. It was a Merchant Ivory Production.

Will watch the The Last Emperor tomorrow. I remember watching it as a kid but don't remember it actually. It was directed by Bernado Bertolucci and has won 9 academy awards......should be a nice weekend movie to see.

I like that. Well let me stress once more time..........I llllikke that......

god help me!

Thursday, July 21, 2005

Few more one-liners........

Following are some of the funny things that I used to note down at the end of my notebook during my college days, about my teachers.

  • Suppose say, there is somethinglike water in the pond.
  • If you don't do the homework, I'll kneel down in the sun.
  • Now I make this a double bond, and I get a Tyu-Butene (for saying 2-butene)
  • Hey......why are you rotating the college?? (my friend told me this)
  • What is the collolary of this theorem? (for corollary)
  • You know..........8 is always divis by 2.
Shayari by one chem. teacher..........

Don't make noissee........
Don't raise your voice......."

Now, I hardly remember some of these.........anyway, nanna called just now....says Bruno is doing fine and there is no need to worry. So.....I may've a good night sleep now......


Wednesday, July 20, 2005

From grammar to glamour

By the way, there were many grammar mistakes in my previous post. When I was referring to my dog Bruno, I used 'it' in some and 'he' in other sentences. I always had this problem since the begining. I observed this mistake in many others while they talk or write in some articles.
This reminds me of one petty incident happened during my junior college days. We had Sanskrit as second language and the grammar part in the subject was a little tough for many. One of my friends used to dub the grammar as glamour. So in his words,

  • we had lot of 'glamour' in first year than second year in sanskrit and english subjects.
  • students commit many glamour mistakes.
  • students should practice glamour in the subjects and get cent percent marks.
  • and whatever we speak should be 'glamour'atically correct!
Wow!.......its glamourous!.....

One other incident is where one of the lecturers doesn't pronounce the 'Pa' sound. He used to make 'Fa' sound that confused us for a while. Here is the best of all....

He said, " In fre-finals, forty fercent of the fafer will be froblems only, fractice the froblems get good marks and fut in your fockets".

There was another professor in Biochemistry course who used to pronounce the other way. In biochemistry, we had something called 'fibrinogen'. He says, 'pibrinogen'. "Have a pruitpul puture" .......%^&*@#$.......

There were many such funny incidents on which I could recollect a few. Those were the most enjoyable days I spent.

I've been watching quite a few movies lately from the university library. So far, I've seen Fantastic Voyage, In Custody, Sound of Music, Satya, Bedazzled, Run Lola Run, Salaam Bombay and Arth.

I got Pather Panchali, The Last Emperor and Dead Man walking today. I heard a lot of Satyajit Ray movies, but never got to see them actually. One of my friends comments was that he makes sick movies. That was his perception, but he points out that he makes movies on sick and poor people and earns money, laurels and become rich. Ummnnnn.......maybe but having said that, the contemporary movies makes no sense to me as most of them have no story or nothing but sick faces, which has become a trend now.

Hence, I decided watching old classics or some of my all time favorites. I don't mind watching any number of times as they never make me bore. Well films made now are for sheer business. Mahesh Bhatt is one director who openly says that he makes films for money. There is no emotion, film-close-to-my heart or for class. Now, most of them are skin flicks. Well.......there is a glamour mistake there.

Monday, July 18, 2005

Greatest fear

I was surfing the net sometime back and I found an interview with A.R. Rahman. I saw that interview in Rendezvous with Simi Garewal some 2 years ago. Some guy must have recorded and put that on net..... so I played it in my mp3 player.

It was a nice one where he talks about his past, present and about his music. Simi, I observed usually asks many such questions which make the guests to think for a while before they can answer. So was ARR......thinking......taking his time to answer.....pausing occasionally and is very good at giving succinct replies.

One such question was, "What is your greatest fear?". He replied, "To lose your loved ones". True, the answer for that question could be anything. But I could relate to what he said. It is really frightening to imagine about any person whom you see all the time in front of you, suddenly disappears forever. There was this other interview of Javed Akthar few years back, where he mentioned that those were really horrible times for him when both his parents expired. "I felt I was standing in front of a tiger", he exclaimed.

What made me to bring about this topic is just a couple of days back, my father called me from India. He never calls unless its an emergency. It was about my 10-year old dog, Bruno. It's sick and vomiting foam. This was unusual. He said he's taking Bruno to hospital and take X-ray to see what happened. Its stomach was bulging it seems and isn't looking good.

After couple of hours, I was told that Bruno can survive a maximum of 6 months. Its spleen and liver stopped functioning and when it deteriorates, it'll be euthanized. The very thought of it was shocking. We all raised Bruno. ......

It came to our house during the 1996 world-cup final. Sri Lanka was winning at that time and we were excited to see a small animal in our drawing room, which was nothing but a pseudo skeleton with a big tail. We loved it so much that we made him sleep next to our beds. It is like we all were growing at the same time. The most interesting part was when he used to understand what I say. As if he knows Telugu. Not even hand signs but a mere change in the tone would explain everything. I still remember the way he shows his happiness, the way he surrenders when he does something wrong and his furiosity.

Hearing about a living being dying in a matter of time is very scary. Its like a cancer...more like a deadline. Yes, really a 'dead'line. Ofcourse, many might have experienced this painful time but it still scares them once they recollect the past.

Many say, facing death is the biggest fear a person can have. But losing your loved ones is the greatest fear of all. The best one could do is to take a good care and be close to him. I told my mother to take as many pictures of Bruno as they can. I hope to see Bruno when I go back in november. Again, its just a matter of time....................

Friday, July 15, 2005

Its time.....

It took me about 20 minutes on what I should start with. This is because I don't have the habit to write or type something more often. I heard people 'maintaining' personal diaries etc. which they say is a good habit and keeps them mentally healthy.

For me, I never had to do that because I hardly used to think of anything else and lot of the time my brain is blank without any thoughts. I tried to 'maintain' a diary during my engineering days, but as would be the case.....not for long. Maybe it was not a good time as there are many other things to do in those four years.

My mother says that I can remember things from my childhood and she boasts about my memory. Wow! that was long time back. In the recent years, I started forgetting few things, stopped thinking about other things for the simple reason that I was not thinking at all! I guess there was too much work after that.....and ..........well.....thats about it.

So its time for me to keep track of few important/nasty/petty things that might help in remembering something or help me (or others) to improvize as a person. Also, I think there is nothing wrong in trying out few things other than the routine. Explore.......explore.....

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